Great Grandma Rose

There were two birthdays in our family this week. Charlie turned six, and my mom would have been 86. I wish they could have known each other.

Our family loves babies. It wouldn't be much of an exaggeration to say that we worship them. I remember my mom saying that poor people had so many babies because they brought happiness into a life that didn't offer much more. As a young mother with five kids--and one more who was born when she was 40--she didn't have a lot of time to enjoy all her "happiness." But when the grandkids came along, it was a different story. I can still hear her laughing at the funny things they did and said. She got a lot of joy from them, from the time they were babies until well into their teens.

Mom taught me the Rules For Being A Grandma:

(1) Always say "yes" when asked if you can babysit, even if it means changing your plans.

(2) Hold an infant as much as you can, because no amount of snuggling is too much.

(3) Always let them see you smile and hear you laugh so they know how happy they make you. (And I've learned that it's okay to let them see your tears, too. Children are compassionate.)

(4) Let them eat what they enjoy. Contrary to what my daughter will tell you, it's up to their parents to be sure they get nutritious meals. Grandmas are supposed to be "sugary."

(5) If you don't want to spoil them with toys and treats, buy them a book. Never say no to a new book.

(6) Have them sleep over once in a while, and tell them they are your favorite. (If you have more than one, tell them not to tell the others.)

(7) Lighten up. Let them jump on the couch and climb on the counters. Just because your kids weren't allowed, it doesn't mean their kids shouldn't.

(8) If they cry when you have to reprimand them, tell them you were only kidding.

(Okay, that last one was mine. Mom never taught me that. She also didn't let them jump on the couch or climb on the counters.)

Mom never got to hold her great granddaughter, but I feel like she knows Charlie. She would have been a great great grandmother. I tell Charlie stories about her. She knows that I treasure the things I have from Great Grandma Rose, and she does, too. She's inherited a few things herself--her strong will and determination, her insistence that something be done the right way, her sense of style and her middle name--Charlotte Rose. Mom would be so proud.

Here's Charlie with the raccoon I crocheted for her birthday...

...and here's the glitter/glue picture of a birthday cake that Charlie started, because another Rule For Being A Grandma is that it's never too late in the day to start a messy art project. Maybe we'll even finish it someday.

Happy Birthday, Mom and Charlie. My heart is full.

Charlie's Fever -- A Survival Story

Except for a few days spent in NICU for a low platelet count ("Charlie's Bad Day..." 1/27/10), our little Beansprout has enjoyed perfect health. Other than teething, a diaper rash or two and the occasional bumps and bruises that come with being a Stunt Baby in Training, her days have been healthy and happy, filled with lots of love and little pain. We have been blessed.

But earlier this week, Charlie started running a fever -- a "beneficial" fever. (I guess the "beneficial" part was that her little body was fighting off something that might have been worse than a fever.)

By the time Charlie's mommy was her age (10-1/2 months), Meagan had had numerous fevers -- one so high that we took her to the emergency room in the middle of the night, where she was given an aspirin suppository. Other times, her father (that would be My Awesome Husband Greg) actually sat in a tub of cool(ish) water with her. (Doctor's advice.) And while my baby was burning up with fever, I did what I do best -- I worried! That voice in my head -- the one pointing out all the things that could be wrong with her (including things I'd never even heard of) -- would not shut up!

So naturally, when Meagan called me with news that Charlie had a fever, my mind immediately traveled back to those days when Meagan was my baby, and my baby had a fever...

I was impressed with how calm Meagan sounded over the phone as she told me that the thermometer had registered 102. But, even though my mind was racing to "Panic," I tried to sound calm, too; so maybe if you asked Meagan, she'd say she was impressed with how calm I was. Calm is not how I felt, however.

You may think I'm being silly and overly dramatic, writing about "surviving" a fever that never got higher than 101, and lasted only 24 hours. That's okay. Sometimes I am silly, and I'm often overly dramatic. I'm also very grateful that we weren't facing something more serious for Charlie!

I know it's not realistic to think you can have a child who never gets sick. And I know that as a mother and grandmother, I'll always be prone to worry, bordering on panic. I also know that my daughter has a pretty good head on her shoulders, and either did not inherit my tendencies, or is a far better actor than I could ever be.

For now, I'm just thanking God for hearing this grandmother's prayers. Our baby is fine again, amen!

Charlie's Thanksgiving Blog

Charlie Crawls -- Get Ready, World! (November 2010, Joe Kopp)

Last year I didn't post my Bowl of Chairies Thanksgiving blog until January 24, 2010 -- the day before Charlie was born. That day I wrote about about how my favorite part of Thanksgiving 2009 had been sitting with Meagan on the couch while the rest of the gang played games at the kitchen table. Together, we looked through the journals I had kept for Meagan when I was pregnant and, sporadically, as she grew.

I recently opened one of those little books so I could compare my Meagan to Charlie when she was the same age -- Ten months old Thanksgiving Day!

Oh, how it all began coming back to me...I wrote to Meagan about how she would climb to the top of the stairs with nary a thought about the consequences, should she miss a step. Charlie hasn't made it to the top stair yet -- at least not on my watch -- but I have saved her from injury a time or two, catching her as she sits on thin air halfway up!

I wrote about how Meagan would climb up and stand on the coffee table. Charlie hasn't done that, but then neither is she walking yet -- Something Meagan started doing when she was nine months old. Charlie seems to prefer crawling, and no one is rushing her!

I wrote about how I would be exhausted from trying to keep up with Meagan all day, as she tore from one "project" to another. I remember making sure that everything in our lower cupboards and on reachable shelves was safe for her to play with. And watching helplessly as she emptied every one of them, thinking I'll clean it up later -- At least she's having fun! Now I sit helplessly and watch Charlie de-book the shelves she can reach, and I think, At least she's not trying to lick the bottoms of someone's shoes or eat the cats' food! For now.

(Did I say I was exhausted then? I was only 26 years old! I didn't even know what exhaustion was!)

I also wrote about how, even though I was exhausted, there were moments in every single day when I was filled with such contentment, I felt like my life was perfect.

Charlie does that to me, too.

Now, as I finish this post, we have celebrated Charlie's first Thanksgiving. There was turkey and stuffing, potatoes and pie. And Charlie's Grandma Vickie and Grandpa Joe were here from Nebraska. Uncle Dj was here, still trying to win Charlie's heart. (I know that someday they're going to be such good friends, we won't believe that she ever cried when he wanted to hold her. But that day isn't here yet.) Our dear friends Jason and his Wendy were also here, and Great Aunt Dawn and Cousin Ali came a little later. And Charlie was wonderful. Even when she got tired and cried.

So this Thanksgiving was special, and I am thankful...

Charlie Has Two Grandmas!

Charlie with Grandma Vickie, June 2010

I've been writing this blog as Charlie's Grammakate -- the grandma who's fortunate enough to live in the same town as Charlie, the grandma who's blessed to be able to see Charlie nearly every day, the grandma who is now easily recognized by Charlie as one of the regular "crew."

But Charlie's Grandma Vickie, who lives far away in Nebraska, loves Charlie every bit as much as I do; you can see it in the picture above.

Grandma Vickie and Grandpa Joe were able to come for a visit last month -- only the second time since Charlie's been born. Thank God for cellular phones with digital cameras and the Internet. Because of those technologies, they have been able to keep up with Charlie's changing and growing through photographs. I know they would love to be closer so they could see Charlie more often, and I know how it must pull at their hearts to have to leave after each visit.

I would gladly share my Charlie time with Grandma Vickie. I think we would have fun doing "grandma" things together with her -- things like going to the park, baking cookies, going to the bookstore, feeding her sweets between meals...I remember to give Charlie special kisses for Grandma Vickie every day while I'm doling out my own, and I look forward to the day when she'll understand what I'm telling her.

I just wanted to write a little bit about Charlie's far-away grandma and grandpa -- The beautiful people who raised a wonderful son who married my amazing daughter, who together (with a little help from God), presented us with the miracle that is Charlie!

Charlie's First Easter

Charlie Models her Easter Bib (a gift from "Aunt" Beth), April 4, 2010

It's official. My husband, Greg (a/k/a Charlie's Grandpa) and I feel like Real Grandparents now. The "Kids" brought the "Grandkid" over for Easter.


It was a perfectly beautiful day, and hamburgers and hotdogs on the grill were perfect fare.

In addition to the folks pictured here...

The Whole Gang: Dominic and his Sydney, Meagan, Joe and their Charlie (photo by My Awesome Husband Greg)

...we also had our "Borrowed Babies," Taylor and Jordyn Gottlieb and their mom, Gina.

Eggs were hidden and subsequently found, hoops were hula-ed, balls were tossed over fences and into trees; a great time was apparently had by all.

Then there was Charlie...

Her mom informs me that she was over-tired and cranky once they got home, but she was a perfect angel while she was here. I think that means that she loves visiting Grandpa and Grammakate, and that she would like to come here again -- often. She didn't really seem to feel like playing with all the toys, or reading all the books we have for her, but she looked around a lot, and I can tell she liked what she saw!

Charlie and Her Great Grandpa Tom

Grammakate holds Charlie, January 31, 2010, Charlie's first day home. (Photo by Papa-Razzi Greg)

A short while ago, I read a book by Blair Underwood (yes, the guy from LA Law) about some amazing things that have been said by children...Things like, "Yes, I knew my grandma...She took care of me before I came here." I loved the book; it gave me some wonderful goose-bump moments.

I had one of those goose-bump moments with Charlie yesterday...

I had gone over to Meagan and Joe's in the afternoon to take care of Charlie so Meagan could take a nap with both eyes closed, her ears set on "silent." (Of course she will soon learn that mothers can never really do that; meanwhile, I'm more than happy to have the job!)

For about 30 minutes, Charlie was awake and alert -- the most awake that I have yet seen her. I sat cradling her head in my hands and gazing into her wise little face, trying to get some kind of a handle on what it must be like for her...She's safe at home now, with a devoted mother and father and two reluctant feline siblings; but she has yet to realize that this is her kingdom, where she will rule with complete sovereignty!

Meagan actually was able to doze, and Charlie eventually began to fuss. (Oh! Maybe she does know who rules!) Trying to buy Mommy a little more time, I nuzzled my granddaughter into my neck and spoke softly to her as we strode about the kingdom.

That didn't actually work, so I attempted a song...Unfortunately I couldn't remember what I used to sing to my own babies. I sat back down with her, thinking I might try reason, when something came to me...Ahh-ah. Ahh-ah. Ahh-ah-ahh-ah-ahh-ah. My dad sang that. I guess it was singing. All of us kids and our kids and the other kids he sang it to thought it was singing. It had always worked for him, and it usually worked for me whenever I used it. I tried it on Charlie as I watched her scrunch her face up for a yell.

She stopped fussing. She stopped moving. And she turned her head to the side as if she were looking for someone. I got chills. In that instant, I had a vision of Great Grandpa Tom walking little Charlie around Heaven, humming his little sing-song ditty for her.

I miss you Dad. I wish you and Mom were here now so we could share Charlotte with you!